The clock marked midnight. I closed my eyes tightly and turned away from the alarm clock. I didn’t need a constant reminder to point out that time was creaking by and I was still unable to get to sleep. The way it looked I was well on my way to another sleepless night. I tossed and turned for another hour before I gave up and got out of bed. I walked into the kitchen and got a glass of milk.

“Can’t sleep?”

I jumped and emptied my glass all over my shirt.

“What the fuck?” I looked around. “Rick? What are you doing sitting there in the dark?”

It was my roommate’s boyfriend. I imagined him and Sue had gotten into yet another fight and she had kicked him out of her room again. He rushed over to where I stood and handed me a towel.

“I’m so sorry man. I thought you knew I was out here.”

“Dude, how could I…”

I stopped in mid sentence. There he stood in his shorts. His broad shoulders gleamed in the moonlight. I had always thought he was attractive, but now that I had seen him in just boxers I thought he was gorgeous. His big clumsy hands wiped at my chest with the towel. I placed my hand over his and smiled. He smiled back and then quickly pulled his hand away. It snapped me back to reality and I took a step away from him. What was I thinking? This was my roommate’s boyfriend. They had been dating for well over a year, there was no way I could make a move on him.

He walked out of the kitchen area and sat on the sofa. I pulled off my shirt and used it to dry my smooth chest off. For the first time I was self-conscious. I walked into the living room and took a seat next to him. The only light in the room came from the streets. I sat as close as I could without being too obvious that I was into him.

“What’s the matter?” I asked. “Did you and Sue have another argument?”

“Yeah,” he turned towards me.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No, I don’t want Sue to hear us talking.”

My mind raced. This was the perfect opportunity to ask him to come into my room. I hesitated and he looked around as if waiting for me to ask. I knew that if I did, there would be no turning back. Part of me wanted to do the right thing and respect the relationship, but all they did was argue. I never understood why they stayed together, so really, I would be doing her a favor, I rationalized.

“Would you like to come to my room?”

As soon as the words were out of my mouth I regretted them. If we fooled around it would hurt Sue, but if we didn’t then I would feel like a fool. Rick held all the cards in his hand. If he wanted something to happen he would have to make the move, I thought.

Rick nodded and we both went into my room. He sat down on my bed and I turned on the lights.

“No,” he covered his eyes. “Do you mind if we talk with the lights off?”

I turned off the lights and closed the