good an actor not to pull it off.” Joseph argued but continued, “However if you really don't want to come, I'm sure we can think up some reasonable explanation for your not being there. Just keep in mind that sooner or later the two of you are going to have to meet.”

They argued about it for a while and then dropped the subject. However, when Rich and Joseph were alone later Joseph again pressed the issue. He again asked him if he could try to make the effort to meet Fazzi. “Why won't you at least come to the party? You know just put in an appearance and then leave if you feel uncomfortable.”

“I just don't want to meet the man that I happen to be sharing my lover with. This is just one more condition for my allowing this to continue. I just don't want to meet the man whose ass hole I've been kissing by proxy.”

“WHAT?”

“You heard me! You plow his ass and then you use your cock to… Never mind, forget that I said that. I guess I'm being foolish again. Maybe I'm not as strong as I thought I was.” Rich said as he broke down in tears.
It's a little late to be bringing this up now.” Joseph said.

“I know it's all my fault. I insisted you do this. But I want you to know the truth about the reason I agreed to this in the first place. It was not because I give a damn about the country or that I feel patriotic about what we are doing. No! Don't even let that idea slip into it. The fucking truth is that the only reason I am doing this is because I do not want to see you get killed overseas. It is not for some patriotic reason-hell no! It's just pure selfishness. I did not even want you to leave the US. The picture of you lying on some fucking battlefield torn to shreds or coming back to me in God knows what condition haunts me. I don't know if I could be strong enough to take that and I did not want to find out if I could.”

The soldier gathered his tear-racked lover's body into his arms and pressing the rear of his head into his chest as he embraced the sobbing body to himself.

“Rich, listen to me. I'm going to tell you the truth! Hear what I'm going to tell you for the first and last time! I'M AS GUILTY AS YOU ARE!” He said.

“I don't know what I would have done if you had not agreed to this. Since meeting and falling in love with You; I have changed, hell everything has changed. I know I have always told you and everyone else that as a soldier I'm a paid killer. I believed that before and to some extent I still do. Only now there is a bit of a difference. Those same visions that plague you now haunt me. That past bravado has become bullshit-just camouflage. I don't really know what I would have done had this opportunity not come about. I tried not to think about it, but for the first time in my life-I had someone beside myself to think about. I even thought about deserting. The only thing that I would not do or even consider was leaving you. Right now, at this moment, if you say “yes” I would take