One night, not terribly long ago, several of my residents had come to visit and play some board games to pass the time. We began with Trivial Pursuit and having finished that, I pulled out my X-rated version of the game.

The four of us, myself, Tim, Kevin and Matt, had just begun play when a question about rubber toys came up. After a somewhat lengthy debate about what the game meant, two of the guys admitted that they had never seen a vibrator or fake cock or other toys in real life. I was quick to say that I had several toys they could look at if it would give them a better idea of what I was talking about. They all quickly agreed that they were interested in playing "show and tell."

I got up from the table and went to my desk. Opening my bottom filing cabinet drawer, I pulled out several shoeboxes and placed them on the table, moving the game board out of the way. I opened the lids of the three boxes and watched the guys pore over the contents. I suggested that we dump them out and examine them further, and met with no hesitation. So I did. Soon, covering the table was a vast collection of every conceivable sex toy available on the market. (I am in the habit of buying everything and trying them out).

The guys were hesitant to touch until I told them that all of them were clean, and they began picking different things up and waving them at each other. Kevin was the first to look at me questioningly and ask, "Exactly why do you have all these things, Andrew?" The other two chimed in with similar remarks and faces. I took all of the toys from their hands and laid them down. I picked up the first thing I saw and said, "Well, here is your five minute education in sex toys, guys. First of all, you all know I am gay, right?"

They nodded, somewhat solemnly, glancing sideways at each other curiously. I resumed my discussion. "On the table are represented many of the sex toys you see in the backs of dirty magazines. First, we have the classic fake penis, represented here in several styles and sizes. Each is different and provides a different stimulation. This one here, for example, has raised ridges which provide extra frictional stimulation going in and out.

"Then we have the battery operated vibrators. I have, as you can see, five or six of these, and each is different like the dildos I just mentioned.

"Then we have the class that is a collection of a bunch of different things. These, for example, are various sizes and styles of cockrings, these are anal beads, and these are some other anal masturbation devices."

Matt said, "You mean you put all of these in your ass?"

"Yep. Most of 'em. I have found that they enhance my masturbatory experiences tremendously when the real thing is, for whatever reason, unavailable."

Tim held up my 24 inch rubber cock. "Surely you can't be serious! You put this huge thing up your ass?" he cried incredulously.

"Not all of it, mind you, but I've managed to get over half of it up my chute with relative ease."

"I just cannot believe that, man," Tim said. "Never in a million years will I sit here and listen to you tell me that you