“I’m not going.”

“It’s almost time, so you’d better get moving,” Tim said, running his fingers through Ryan’s hair with a dissatisfied look. “Did we cover all of the bases?”

“Why don’t you go instead?” Ryan asked. “Everybody loves you.” He was whining, and that was unattractive, and he didn’t care.

“The Cab Café, seven o’clock,” Tim said, reciting from memory as he plucked at Ryan’s bangs. “The reservation’s under Gillian, his name’s Shawn, he’s six feet tall, blond hair, blue eyes, algebra teacher.”

“I hate algebra,” Ryan said. “I hate math.”

“You have your keys, your wallet, your cell phone, breath mints, and condoms,” Tim said, abandoning Ryan’s hair to fill Ryan’s hands.

“Condoms?” Ryan asked, and stared at Tim with horrified eyes.

“To be on the safe side,” Tim said. “At least stick a couple in your wallet.”

“So when I pull out my wallet to pay, he can see that I’m ready to get it on at a moment’s notice?” Ryan asked. “I don’t have sex on the first date. I don’t have sex the first night I meet someone! I’ve never seen this guy in my life and-”

“You don’t have sex at all,” Tim said, refusing to let Ryan hand the condoms back to him. “That’s part of the problem.”

“I don’t like to leave my apartment, I don’t like strangers, I don’t like blind dates, and I don’t like you,” Ryan said. He dropped the condoms and stared at Tim defiantly. “And I’m not taking those.”

“Okay,” Tim said cheerfully. “Ready to go?”

“Come with me,” Ryan said quickly. “You can introduce us. Break the ice.”

“I’m not going to come along on your date with you,” Tim said. “Paul’s waiting for me. Just go. Have a good time. Drive safely. Remember to order something you can eat without making a mess.”

Ryan stared at Tim, eyes round, mouth falling open.

Seeing that he’d made a critical error, Tim rushed on. “You’ll be fine. It’s one night. You’ll have a good time. You love eating out. Maybe he’ll even pay!” he added brightly, pushing Ryan towards the door. “I love you, have a great time, call me to tell me all about it!” he said, and, with one hard shove, got Ryan safely outside. Then he locked the door and smiled. “Good luck.”

…

Ryan sat in the parking lot of The Cab Café and looked at his steering wheel. He could go home. Tim would be gone by now. He could go home, make a nice sandwich, and watch some TV. It would be a very pleasant evening.

He could go somewhere else. Get a good dinner, a night out, somewhere without a blind date attached.

He could go in and look around, peek around, see what Shawn the algebra teacher looked like. And, if Shawn happened to see him, he’d say that he was someone else.

Meeting someone new, making conversation… He hated strangers. He never knew what to say. How was he going to find something to talk about? He had no interesting stories, no fascinating anecdotes. He didn’t even know any good jokes.

He was going home.

Tim would kill him if he went home.

Ryan hesitated. If he ditched Shawn the algebra teacher, Tim would be pissed off. Really pissed off. And that