Perhaps I gave in so easily because Lenny embodied the best of two worlds. First, he was a wonderful, gentle caregiver. He had been coming to my house twice a day for several weeks to take care of my bed-bound grandmother, who was recovering from a broken hip. Second, he was drop-dead gorgeous. All blond Swedish muscle with a shy smile to accompany his sensuous mouth.

I'd had a rough week trying to take care of my grandmother's needs when he came to change her bedding and to give her a massage that Thursday evening. He found me in the kitchen at the table when he was finished getting her ready.

"There," he said, "I think she will go right to sleep. My massages usually take all of the tension out and she goes out like a light."

"Here, sit and have a cup of coffee before you go, Lenny," I told him. "I envy her." Lenny sat across the table from me, filling out the chair and bulging chest and leg muscles stretching his T-shirt and shorts.

"You envy her sleep, her release of tension, or her massage, you mean? Surely you don't envy her age and her pain." He gave me a smile that made me ache.

"Well, the release of tension and the massage, at least," I admitted. "It's been a rough week so far."

"Yes, I could tell. You do look like you could use a good massage. I'm off duty now; I could release that tension for you."

"I don't know, Lenny," I said. "I've never had a massage before."

"I do a great full-body massage, Tim," he said, not taking his eyes from mine. "I sense that's exactly what you need."

"A full-body massage? I don't think I know what that entails."

"Well, the best way to explain it is to do it. Come on, I'll give you a very good free massage. I can get rid of any sort of tension you might have."

I began to suspect what he was proposing, but I was too afraid and hesitant to ask. I could fanaticize, though. I had been dying to be touched by him for weeks.

"Well, OK, what do I need to do?"

"That sounds great, Tim. I've been thinking about your building tension and wanting to give you a massage for some time now. This can be such a difficult time for everyone involved, not just the patient. I care about the whole family. And I like you. I think you've got a hot body, and I enjoy massaging hot bodies."

Lenny cared about me. Great, he thinks I have a hot body. Even greater. "So, I've noticed you have plenty of room in your bedroom for me to set up my massage table. Why don't you take a shower and wrap yourself in a towel and I'll go out to the car and get my table."

When I came out of the bathroom, Lenny had already gotten the massage table set up and had stripped off his T-shirt. What a beautiful bod.

"Up on the table, on your back," he commanded. "Strip the towel and I'll put it over your privates."

I did as he asked and thought he took a bit longer than necessary before draping the towel over me. I wasn't sure how this was going to work out, as I already felt I was