Hey guys, first of all I'm 99% straight (if you could go by percentages?) but I often fantasize about other guys. Well, there's a man that I've grown pretty close to that is gay (secretly but I found out and he knows it) that I'm starting to want to have some fun with, and he deserves it because he's a great guy. Problem, you ask? I've never had any form of sex with a man.
Any tips for a complete novice? I'm going to be on bottom also. it's what i like and where he'll want me to be lol.
Also, I'm 19 and he's about 50ish and hairy, not in bad shape but not my taste either. I still want to please him and let him use me to please himself, but...I dunno...I guess, why do you others like 'bears'? Maybe your reasoning will help me become more physically attracted to his type.
thanks for any advice! sorry if that was a bit ramblish lol.
Posted: 9/28/2008 Post subject: As long as you desire it and both are willing...
...enjoy yourselves. Be clear up front that you are unsure about this but that you are attracted to him and would like to explore that. Be clear that there is no guarantee. You may not be aware of fuck buddies. That is when two guys enjoy sex with each other and do not guarantee any emotional attachment. It's a safe place to begin from.
The age thing does not matter as long as both of you are willing. I had to learn to get comfortable with that as I find myself in love with and living with a man just a few years older than you and I'm coming up on the 50 age. Getting comfortable with this has been a growing journey for me <smirk>
[Getting off my soap box] Just have some fun sharing such pleasure with another person.
As for who you are attracted to. I think trying to understand 'why' you are attracted to someone gets in the way of the experience. Why is a part of our reasoning, left brain hemisphere. Attraction is physical sensations and emotions. They do not necessarily make sense to who we think we are. I cannot fathom how my partner loves my taller and a bit bigger and older body... I am just so glad that his eyes glisten when he sees me. Maybe that comes from the soul, our deeper self? _________________ "You are just a thought away from the change you desire."
LL
Austin
You are the actor, writer, producer of your life. Generate your mission on the planet while you are here.
We've discussed it and it's been made clear that it's just for fun and pleasure, especially since i'm "straight" (though apparently bi? lol) and nobody but him knows.
What I'm looking for as far as advice...clean-up? should i just be prepared for a bit of pain? lol if so that's fine, i just want to be ready for it. any other things where maybe one of you wished you had done something in particular to be ready for your first time to keep me from making the same error.
I think the more you prep with a finger(s) and/or toys the less that initial moment (very brief) of strong discomfort (not necessarily pain) will last. Enough prep and there is no pain.
Enjoy the safety and comfort of being with an older man and the journey of enjoying bi/gay sex.
Take care... _________________ "You are just a thought away from the change you desire."
LL
Austin
You are the actor, writer, producer of your life. Generate your mission on the planet while you are here.
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